Chapter 14

…base tan

Kenny Powers: What’s crackin’, ya’ll? Base tan is lookin’ nice. I’m hopin’ to get there myself this season.


…mahalo surfers

Kenny Powers: Mahalo you f*ckin’ surfers. You goddamn nerds. Im just kidding, were all part of the tribe. How are the breaks lookin’? Some lefts? Some rights? Scream rooms? Ape rooms?


…sponge this whole entire ocean up

Kenny Powers: Hell yeah I’m a sponger. I’ll f*ckin’ sponge this whole entire ocean up with my big old d*ck.


…titty f*ck this wave

Kenny Powers: Looks like KP’s about to titty f*ck this wave. Adios!


…stay off my beach

Kenny Powers: You f*ckin’ watch what happens when you’re not a local. Locals only, you f*ckin’ grommet! Stay off my beach!


…Chuck E. Cheese

Kenny Powers: Look at ya’ll, jumpin’ around like a bunch of child molesters in Chuck E. Cheese.


…N-word, please

Kenny Powers: N-word, please. Sometimes these shoulders get tired from carrying the weight of this whole goddamn team.

Kenny Powers: Why don’t you hit me up with your lotion, Darnell. My skin get’s ashy too.

Darnell: White people don’t get ashy.

Kenny Powers: Stop being so racist, man. I’m sick of those comments, dog. Skin is skin. Just ask Jacks.


…say your name gay

Shane: You want people to say your name gay, why don’t you go to France.


…burned that monkey

Kenny Powers: You burned that f*ckin’ monkey! Not you, Darnell.


…our fingers

Shane: Like our fingers were d*cks! And these things were pussies!